Relationships today

09/08/2018 Off By the writer

In today’s world relationships are changing by the day. To think, how they were before and how they are now, and the strange things about them. I mean this for all sorts of relationships, such as:

Lovers

I don’t really get lovers in today’s world, most of them anyways, not devaluing the ones that are really meant to be.

Guy looks at girl, likes her and asks her out, or vice versa. But only to realise in a few months that they aren’t going to work out. They then go from talking to each other all day every day to never talking to each other again, as if they instantly stop thinking about each other. The only way that is possible is if the didn’t care from the beginning, in which case, WHY? Why get together in the first place, or at least talk to each other after falling apart, just so you are sure, just so it gets easier.

That’s the least of the problems with lovers, the biggest is during the relationship. As soon as 2 people get together they let go of the exact things they enjoyed doing as individuals. They go from 2 interesting individual people to 1 set of boring people. There was a time when a relationship was about feeling happy with someone, whereas now it is about making the other person happy, even if it kills your own personality. That’s why the other person loses interest, because you are no longer the person they were attracted to, you changed for the worse. But they say it is called “compromise”, just to dignify themselves.

What happened to the time when 2 people decided to be friends before they got into a relationship, trying to get to know each other. Forget that, people now don’t even get to know each other during the relationship. They may get to know the facts but did they really get to know the person? Hats off to the ones that do, but how many of them are there?

Family

You will always have a love, hate kind of relationship with family. But why can’t they ever see eye to eye with you. I figured it is mainly societal pressures and generation gap.

Writing this blog I remembered something I saw a few weeks ago, on a bench outside my house, there were 3 people, by the looks of it they were child, father and grandfather. I watched for 15 minutes as they continuously spoke to each other and laughed, no phones, tablets or even a newspaper. My heart melted that day. That kind of bonding made me think. I don’t remember the last time I sat down with anyone from my family(apart from once) and just spoke to them. That’s the kind of relationship I want to have with family, one where you can just sit down and talk without hesitation or a pre-planned topic.

Society today dictates how we should be as family, that a parent should behave a certain way with children and the same for parents with grandparents. Just because children do something against society’s norms parents believe that they are wrong, the words “different”, “unique”, “stand out” have almost gone down the dump. That is of course unless a child becomes a huge success from it, in which case society takes the credits, somehow.

Sorry parents, i can’t let society tell me what to study, where to work, who to love, when to marry.

That said there are parents which really talk to their kids and try and understand and support them, and I just want to say thank you to them, for doing what is right.

Friends

Who are your friends? The ones that you can reach out to, the ones whom your parents know and the ones with whom you just be yourself. I don’t think I have any that satisfy all of the above. At least not after growing up.

Kids have it easy for friends, they just play all day during the summer and sit next to each other in school. They will actually meet up every day for no special reason. But as they grow up, in comes technology. What used to a long phone call has now become messages, or in best case, a video call. The worst part is that even 10 year olds are now messaging instead of meeting.

The meaning of friendship has become a social norm today, where you need to post a story whenever you are somewhere interesting with friends, because you only meet up to do something interesting, like going on holiday, or to an event. I personally don’t talk to many people, but when I do I would love to meet up for a simple coffee, put our phones away and just talk. However people just aren’t into that anymore, and would rather chat on social media.

This was just an outlook of relationships, plenty of which I missed, and enough I didn’t write about because the list is endless. I will definitely write more on each topic eventually, as hopefully you will read them.